I will first give some background on my son.  He has a huge heart, is smart, has always done well in school and has amazing friends.  Brennan has severe tactile discrimination and he also has dyspraxia, which we learned about later on.  April 2014 was probably our rock bottom as a family and we had no idea why or what was going on, but it was pretty horrible when I look back.  I just want you to know this to know that there is hope – lots of it!

Our mornings had turned into a battlefield – literally it was World War III.  We would scream and yell at each other and Brennan would kick and fight me every morning.  We would literally have to pick him up and put him in the car and he was not a small child.  I am surprised to this day that the neighbors never called the police as it must have looked horrible.  Brennan would drive to school naked and then I would pull over near school and the fighting would continue for him to put his clothes on.  Brennan goes to a private school and although there is not a uniform, there is a dress code.  Once I would finally get him to put on his clothes and drop him off (he was generally tardy) I would usually start my day driving to work in tears and feeling defeated.  That was a normal day for us, which when I think back, I think how thankful I am for all of the people that have come into our lives and helped us and how much progress we have made. 

The behavior was so bad that we started counseling for our son.  Brennan loved his counselor and although it did not help him with his SPD it helped me learn patience with him. One day in April I was home sick and I sat in bed and watched the normal routine with my husband and Brennan fighting before school like I had done every other morning.  It was not until that very morning that I was watching as an outsider that it hit me that the behavior was only surrounding clothing.  I spent the entire day on the Internet researching and found an occupational therapist in our area and called immediately.  What I will say at this point is that I did things backwards – we did not get Brennan an IEP but I am hoping that what I have learned can help some of you. 

It was like I had found the answers to all of our prayers when I made that first call to the OT.  I found my notes from that first conversation. It was funny because, although I am thankful for finally learning about SPD and realizing this was really a disorder, I was told that Brennan could be “fixed” with extensive therapy 3x a week and Wilbarger brushing for 3 weeks.  It felt like my prayers were answered and I was willing to do anything for my child.  I will say I felt guilty for not realizing this sooner and not taking him to someone sooner but the truth is I JUST DIDN’T KNOW.  Once I realized it was a real disorder I talked with his school and they were amazing.  I could no longer put him in dress code that would literally hurt his skin.  It was crazy that this was why he was acting out and what was actually wrong with him.  Once I knew about SPD things started making sense.  He had so much anxiety about going to school because of the clothes he had to wear, which was why he was acting out.  Brennan felt so relieved when I told him about SPD and when he learned about what was going on with his body.  He is still very private about it and only shares it with his good friends but he is definitely happy to know why he feels the way he does and he is also proud of the progress he has made. 

I immediately set him up for OT sessions 3x a week and I also set an appointment with his pediatrician with whom I have a great relationship, just to be sure we were on the right track.  We started his OT, which was really good for his coordination. I learned how to brush Brennan’s skin, and I was going to brush it every two hours for three weeks while he was awake.  We were also told to go see a Naturopathic doctor, which we did.  I was willing to try everything and anything.  We were told he was Zinc deficient and he started taking naturopathic Zinc and regular Zinc.  I will say to this day the Zinc has definitely helped with his tactile issues.  He stopped taking it at one point and it was horrible.  It’s something worth looking into. 

For the next three weeks we were on a mission. Every two hours that Brennan was awake
I would brush his skin.  It didn’t matter what I was doing I would leave work and run over to his school and brush his skin.  You can only imagine our disappointment when, after the time had lapsed, he was not “cured.”  We then went and saw his pediatrician.  I will never forget that conversation.  She was hesitant on how an OT could diagnose him and how they knew he was Zinc deficient.  At any rate, she sent him to a neurologist to be sure nothing was physically wrong with him.  I went to this appointment and what I learned years later, I pray can help some of you now.

At that appointment, we went in and the doctor spent about 10 minutes with my son and determined that he should consider switching schools because he had a bad day with one of the boys at school.  Mind you, my son loves his school and it is one of the best in our area.   He had him walk on his toes, touch his head and that was about it.  He said he should stay in OT, but other than that, it was a complete waste of time, but that was because he clearly did not understand SPD.  What I have learned years later is that finding the right therapist makes a huge difference.  Today, Brennan has the best neurologist, Dr. Marco, who specializes in SPD and he has made amazing progress under her care. 

Brennan was in occupational therapy for approximately 9 months when I realized he needed something more.  I had done a Facebook chat with Dr. Marco in October 2014 and learned a great deal about SPD. That is where I learned about Dr. Lucy Miller and her book Sensational Kids.  I read her book in January 2015 and told my husband that I was bringing our son to Denver.  I think he literally thought I was crazy but at this point my son was wearing one pair of basketball shorts and one shirt, and that was all.  With Junior High around the corner I wanted to get him all the help that I could.  I also got on the waiting list to see Dr. Marco at U.C.S.F. 

In July 2015 we headed to the STAR Institute Treatment Center in Denver for 5 weeks. I will conclude with this; it changed our lives. I feel that is when our treatment started.  I learned so much, but most importantly, how his brain works and why things happen.  What is important to remember is that it is not something that will be fixed or cured overnight, but with the right doctors your child can make huge progress and your family can live a happy life.  Our current OT actually trained at STAR Institute for Sensory Processing Disorder. I think it is so important to find the right doctors who actually understand SPD. Most importantly, follow your instincts.  You can look on STAR Institute’s website and find OT’s in your area who have been through training at STAR Institute. 

Although we did not get an IEP, I have so many feelings about the system and insurance, but will save all of that for a different day.  I hope this has been beneficial and just remember, take a deep breath and know you are not alone.  There is so much information and people out there who can help.  This is the first step!

Visit the Treatment Directory to find professionals trained in the STAR Treatment Model in your area.

Or fill out the Child Intake Form now to start treatment at the STAR Institute in Denver, Colorado

Kelli Schmidt completed her undergraduate degree at the University of California, Santa Barbara before earning her Juris Doctor law degree from Lincoln Law School of San Jose. Ms. Schmidt is a partner in her law firm, Rocha & Schmidt and is a member of the California Applicants’ Attorneys Association (CAAA), where she currently serves on the Woman’s Caucus Committee and is on the Board of Directors. She is also a past President of the CAAA Santa Clara Chapter.

Outside of her law practice, Kelli Schmidt is devoted to her loving family, including her husband, two amazing young sons, Brennan & Blake and their 2 rescue beagles Lexi and Rocky.  She is also fortunate to live close to her parents who spend quality time with the boys and loves being a soccer/football mom.  Ms. Schmidt enjoys volunteering at her sons' schools and has recently been asked to join the PTPF Board at Brennan's Junior High for the 2016-17 school year.  Ms. Schmidt is fortunate to have a sister living in Hawaii, and Kelli and her family love to travel to the Aloha State to visit her family.